Jesus Loves Me This I Know!!!!

God is so good! Shelby last night started asking questions about Adam and Eve. So, Jen and I broke out the Bible and shared the story with her. We talked about Adam and Eve sinning and the cost of that sin is DEATH!!!! Jen and I went to bed feeling good that Shelby was asking about God. Little did we know that God was pricking Shelby's heart.

We woke up this morning ate breakfast, went to work and school. Everything seemed like a normal day. Then at supper Shelby asked about God again. Jen and I reminded Shelby of Adam and Eve and the cost of sin. Shelby asked if there were people going to Hell. We said "Yes, but they don't have to. Someone has already paid for their sin."
Shelby said "Who?"
We answered "Jesus."
Shelby said "I want to give my life to Jesus, but I don't know how."

At this point my insides were trembling in fear and excitement. We rushed Shelby to see Pastor Stan. He asked her questions to make sure she had a grasp of the whole situation. Then he said "You know we can talk to God. It is called prayer."
Shelby said, "I know."
Stan said, "What do you want to tell God?"
Shelby said, " I want to ask Jesus to save me and to let him know I love him."
Stan was shocked. What a perfect sinners prayer.

My Prayer is:
Thank you God. Shelby is excited to know that you are preparing a place for her in Heaven. Please help Jen and I lead her in the direction you want her to go. I know you have big plans for her. We give her to you and submit to your plan for her life.
In Jesus name I pray. AMEN!

Hey Pumpkin...you come here often?

A neighboring community had their annual Pumpkin Day Festival! We go every year...unless it rains like last year. Here are some pics.

Shelby loved the horse ride!



There was even a little pony for Beth! She was so excited. I am the creepy guy in the green shirt following her.



The girls got their face painted. Ghosts....SPOOOOOOKY!



Shelby played some games and won a Halloween cup with spiders on it. We called it her goblet of death. (AHHH just what every girl needs)



Someone was giving away free puppies and I had to be the bad guy and say NO! Look at this pic....could you tell her no? It hurts me more than it does her.



Shelby picked out a pumpkin. I baby sat the pumpkin for awhile. I kissed it and loved it and called it my own.



And no Pumpkin Day Festival is complete without a hay ride.



All in all it was a great time. Happy Halloween!

Beth's New Cute Quotes

Beth is growing up so quickly! I thought I would take the time to write down a couple cute things she has been saying. I don't ever want to forget them.

1) Beth's Prayer
Dear God,
We love you very much...Thank you Mom and Daddy...In Jes name I pray...Amen

2) When I have the unfortunate responsibility to reprimand Beth, she always runs to Mommy and says in an upset/sad tone "Daddy told me all about it." It melts my heart!

I love that girl so much.
Dear God,
We Love you very much...Thank you Beth....In Jes name I pray..Amen.

Paybacks are so much fun!!!

Today was great! In my business it is important to keep a good rapport with the banks we do business with. Today....I made some true brownie points. One of the local banks in town (Regions Bank) has an employee (Daniel) that goes to college, works at the bank, and bakes bread for people as a side business (Mr. Graham's Bread). He also likes to prank people. Well...What goes around comes around.

Here is a few facts to make this make sense.
1) The bank branch manager (Chris) is an attorney.
2) I know most everyone in the bank and they know me as a cut up.
3) Everyone in the bank knows I have skills.
4) Chris provides me with a badge that says "Professional Civil Process". Which to someone not scared to death...means nothing.
5) Chris provides me with a letter from a reputable law firm from a neighboring metro area. The letter states that Daniel sold bad bread to a client and the client had to be rushed to the hospital and is suing for damages ($5,000.00).


Here is how it played out.
Daniel is already having a bad day being 15 minutes late for work. I show up and stand in the teller line. When one of the tellers asks if they can help me I answer "I am looking for Daniel Graham."

The teller directs me to him as he responds, "Is that a badge?"

I answer, "Yes sir. Can we please step aside in order to have some privacy?"

He agreed.

As he is putting money into his drawer and preparing to lock it up. Another employee (who is in on the gag) says, "Can I help you sir?"

I answer, "No ma'am, I found who I needed."

Daniel, feeling quite uneasy, comes out into the main lobby. I ask him, "Are you Daniel Graham of Mr. Graham's Bread."

He confirms his identity and I quickly respond with, "You are being served. Please sign here."

Shocked Daniel signs and asks, "What should I do?".

I respond, "I am not allowed to discuss the case with you. Please take the letter I gave you to your attorney and he can explain further."

Daniel politely says, "Ok...Thank You." Daniel tried his best to act cool, but he was nervous. I calmly walked out the door.

After I left, Daniel was quoted as saying, "I can't believe I am not out of college yet and am already being sued."

Daniel runs to the only person that he trusts could give him advise....The bank Branch manager/main instigator, Chris.

Chris leads him on a bit before saying, "YOU HAVE BEEN PUNKED!"

I nailed my part. If any Hollywood producers are looking for a fake process server...I am your man!

I fount me a new SWIMMIN HOLE YA'LL

This weekend Jen, Shelby, Bethany, and I went on a family outing to see some of the beautiful sites of our state. WOW...how beautiful it is! We went into the Ouachita National Forest and visited the Little Missouri River Falls. The drive was not bad until we went on dirt roads. The dirt roads were in great shape, but a minivan is not the ideal mode of transportation on them. Bumpy, slow, and dusty.

When we arrived, everyone needed to go to the "Tinkle Tavern" (that is our family's name for the bathroom). We were glad to see that there were bathrooms at the falls. However, I believe I would have rather used the woods than what we had to use. A GLORIFIED PORTA POTTY!!! It smelled horrid. Thank the Lord that we were up in the mountains where the temperature stays cool. Heat that stuff up and....well it would have been game over for me.

We had a quick picnic...I do mean quick because the aroma of the bathrooms would waft over to enhance our dining pleasure.

Besides that, we had a blast. The falls are gorgeous, even in August when we have not had a lot of rain. We swam in them. WOW WAS IT COLD!!!! We did get used to the temp of the water and had a great time. Being in the mountains and swimming in the icy waters changes a man...no really...my clothes were wet...I had to change. And you thought I was going to get deep and philosophical on you!

Bad Boys Bad Boys What ya gonna do...

We had an incident last night that still blows my mind. For those of you that don't know, I live on a quiet street. However, if you go a few streets Southeast....not so quiet. Sometimes we get a little foot traffic through our area that has nothing better to do than to cause problems. They don't live on this street, but the come through from time to time.

Last night after supper, Shelby invited her friend Madison over to play. I was watching the girls as my wife had two meetings last night to attend. As I was in my recliner Shelby and Madison storm into the house saying that these kids are going to beat Madison up. I looked outside and saw about 7 or 8 kids that I did not know hanging around in front of my house.

There is not a lot I can do about the situation unless they verbally harass my kids or they come unto my property. So I wait. Then one of the kids rides his bike through my lawn. I go outside and tell the kid to stay off of my lawn. (Sounds like an old man, but whatever.)

Then Madison's Mom comes home and I send Madison home. Don't worry...I watched her the whole way. Madison's mom tells the crowd to disburse and go away. The crowd moves down the street and starts to call Madison's Mom a cracker. (Not an endearing term.)

As I am talking to Danny, (my Contractor who is trying to finish my bathroom remodel), we see one of the older girls from the crowd walk up with 4 others and knock on the carport door of Madison's. Danny and I watch. Madison's Mom opens the door and tells the aggressor to leave. The girl screams "No...I'm gonna beat your !$#@%".

So Danny starts over to help as this girl starts backing Madison's Mom into her kitchen. I call 911. The aggressor flees the scene when she finds out we called the PO-PO! Five minutes later the police arrive. We all had to fill out reports and I think the girl was charged with Harassment (a misdemeanor). In my opinion this girl needs to be in Juvee!

I know where she lives and I know who she is. I have my eagle eye on her! I will summon my "Eagle Powers" Sorry that's a line from Nacho Libre. Anyway, I don't think this will be the last time the cops hear of her. She is too bold, angry, and out of control. I wish something could be done now to better correct her before we as citizens have to pay for her room and board in a prison somewhere.

Waiter THERE'S A FLY IN MY SOUP!!!

Ok, not a fly and not soup. Here is the scoop!
My parents came down for a visit this week. I love to spend time with them and I wish I did not live so far away...but back to the story. We went shopping in a suburb of our state capital for Shelby's back to school supplies/clothes. After a long morning of shopping, Jen, Shelby, Beth, my parents, and I were starving. (Ok...not starving..I mean most people who know me will agree missing a meal would do more good for me than not.) We were hungry. So we stopped at Applebees hoping for a good steak to charge us up for the remainder of the day.
Our waitress took our drink orders. When they arrived Jen had a big surprise! A piece of SOMEONES GUM WAS LEFT ON THE SIDE OF THE GLASS! HELLO! GAG A MAGGOT! Papa motioned for the manager who apologized and got Jen a new glass. I know what you are thinking..."Ok, that has happened to me...Big Deal!"
WELL it doesn't end there. My Mom ordered a steak and I ordered a salad and a pasta with chicken dish. When the food arrived everyone was enjoying and laughing about the gum situation. My Mom and I decide to trade plates since I am more of a steak guy and she thought my dish looked great. When I got the steak platter from Mom there was A LONG GNARLY HAIR ON THE POTATOES!!! COME ON MAN...REALLY...ARE YOU SERIOUS! Papa motions for the manager again.
The end result was a meal voucher for next visit and a new steak. In closing...might I reiterate...GAG A MAGGOT!!!!!!

Ripped OFF!!!!

I am angry. I don't normally get angry and stay angry. Jen, Shelby, Beth, Madison, and I went to the Mercy Me concert last night at a nearby theme park. We are season pass holders there.
Last week I went online to the parks website for basic info....Starting time and ticket price for Madison. (Madison does not have a season pass.) The site quoted the starting time at 8:00. Also, the site said reserved seating would be $5-$10. So, I offered to pay for Madison's ticket.
WELL!!!!! When we got there at 7:30 the concert was in full swing! It had started at 7 rather than 8. The ticket booth required me to pay $21.75 for Madison's ticket since the park was open until 10 that night.
I paid $21.75 to see about half of a Mercy Me show followed by Bethany throwing a fit. I think Beth was too hot and tired. Anyway, we did not even get to stay to ride rides after the concert due to Beth's status. We ended up going home directly after.
Do you ever wonder why someone invented the saying, "I love it when a plan comes together"? Me too....because it never does! AHHHHHHHHH.
P.S.
I emailed the park and gave them a piece of my mind. I am sure they are trembling in their money filled boots.

What we have here is a failure to communicate!

Well...I had to ground Shelby. She is at the age now that a grounding or stern talk works just as well as spankings. Thank God for that. You know spanking Shelby really did hurt me more than it did her. Groundings don't hurt me near as bad. I will reserve spankings for a last resort punishment.
Anyway...back to the offense. Shelby was playing with my hat. I told her to stop and explained that my hat is not a toy, it is flimsy and would not fair well in the care of a child. She took heed of my warning at first, but 30 minutes later she was back at it.
I was very upset and sent her to her room. After calming down (a very important step to any disciplinary action) I told her she was grounded for a day. To ensure this experience was a learning one, I explained that...and I quote..."Shelby, I am not mad about what you were playing with, I am mad that you were playing with something I told you not to play with. So, I am not mad about the hat, but about your disobedience. Do you understand?"
Shelby's reply was..."I don't understand just one word. What does replayin mean?"
Evidently, my accent is amplified in anger. "were playing" is evidently pronounced replayin in the south. Yeah...I'm a redneck.

Anyway, Shelby had to stay inside on the only sunny day last week.

Can we fix it....YES WE CAN!!!!

Jen came home!!!! I am not nearlly as pathetic now as I was in my last post. Yes...as you can tell I fall apart without her.
I have found new motivation to finish remodeling my master bath. Basically, Jen came home and requested (strongly) that I finish. I need to finish the drain to the new shower and some small electrical work. Then it is up to my contractor. I think the worst part of it all is the sight of me in a tool belt. Picture it...No I won't post a pic....Me in shorts, a white t-shirt, sandals, socks to mid calf, and then the TOOL BELT!!! It is functional not stylish.

I have finished the following:
Removed old toilet, sheetrock, and sink
Removed old cast iron tub (rediculously heavy...even after I broke it in half with a sledge hammer.)
Removed a window
Installed a new toilet
Replaced copper plumbing to allow for a shower
Replaced sink
Repaired weak floor/subfloor
Installed vent fan

My contractor will install all sheetrock and shower walls. Then we are done. I would try to do the drywall myself, but if you have not done it before you will be able to tell.
Here is a before pic!!!

One is the loneliest number....!

This weekend I bached it. Jen and the girls went to see some releatives. Some people would pay to have a little quite time for themselves. NOT ME! I started dating Jen when I was 15 and now I am 30. That means every day I live...is one more day I have been with Jen than when I was single. So you can imagine how I would be lost without her. Not to mention my little girls.
Jen takes trips very rarely, maybe 2 times a year. I normally watch movies and don't emerge from the house except for work. I promised myself I would not do that this time.
Friday night was the first night without her and I forced myself to go to the movies. I watched Harry Potter. It was ok..but it would have been more fun with Jen. Other than the movies, I introverted and stayed in the house.
I guess what I am saying is I miss my friend! That reminds me of Darryl Worley's song...you can check it out if you want..I won't I might cry.

GERONIMO!!!!

Well tonight kicked off VBS at our church. We had a night at the city's Aquatic Park. Shelby invited a neighborhood friend (Madison) and we had a blast. It was my job to watch them. Madison is a couple years older and quite proficient at swimming. Shelby is a floater...depending on her Hannah Montana life jacket to keep her up. Madison was jumping off the diving board and riding the slides. Shelby was jumping off the side of the pool. I tried to get her to jump off the low diving board....NO GO! She would get on the board, then turn and run back down! I did not pressure her....it will come in time.
I did jump off of the diving board. You know...the fat boy jump. CANNON BALL!!!! or to switch it up....CAN OPENER!!! Have you noticed that every fat guy has these two jumps in his bag of tricks? I think it is because diving without a splash is impossible. When you displace as much water as I do...there will be a splash. So rather than fight fate...embrace it with the Cannon Ball or Can Opener! Anyway, we had fun. I can't wait for VBS tomorrow.

Here I come to save the day!!!!

Today I was SUPERMAN!!!! I was wrapping up some work getting ready for the weekend before heading home when the phone rang. It was my precious wife sounding not so precious. She had the littlist tinge of fear in her voice. She told me that Shelby had a huge splinter in her hand and Jen was unable to get it out. I could hear Shelby crying in the background.
Little did Jen know that she had summoned Adamous Adam!!!! In a dash I was in the ADAM BOMB on my way to save the day. I hit the gas speeding down 5th only slowing when I was passing the police & sherrif's station. (After All I don't think they would recognize Adamous Adam. Ha Ha Ha!)
When I got home Shelby was still crying. After pulling out THE TWEEZENATOR (Tweezers) I made quick work of the splinter. It was huge and deep...but was no match for Adamous Adam!!!!
After the job was done, Jen said, "Thank you for being my hero!" I'M THE KING OF THE WORLD!!!!

Sweet Wheels Man!

Jen and I have talked about getting Shelby a new bike. The bike she has is from when she was three. If she grew anymore she would need knee pads to save her from the handlebars!!!
Well a co-worker is having a birthday tomorrow so I made a trip to Walmart. (The shopping mecca of our humble city.) As I was looking for a good gift, I walked by the bicycle isle. Memories of my childhood rushed through my mind. I remember riding my bike across my hometown to go to grandma's, friend's, and family's houses. It was my first taste of freedom.
Then the debate started. On one-hand it was a different time then. It was pre-Adam Walsh. On the other hand, should Shelby miss this important step in her life (freedom) because I am afraid?
I bit the bullet and bought my childhood brand of bike HUFFY! When I brought it home I was so excited to see Shelby's reaction. (And scared to see Jen's reaction since I didn't include her.) When I got home there was jumping up and down... high pitched screaming...a disire to ride it immediately....and that was just my reaction. Just kidding! Shelby was so excited! So was Jen! SANTA AIN'T GOT NOTHING ON ME!

UPDATE:
We just started the training on the new bike. We have a ways to go. No skinned knees though....I call that a success. After all of the adjusting we did to the bike, it is still a little big for her. She will grow into it very soon.

Jesus is a friend of Mine!!!!! ZAP!!!

Ok,
A friend of mine sent this to me a few months ago. It is sooo funny! ZAP! Just click the link below.

Jesus is a friend of mine.

Oh what a night!

Shelby (my oldest daughter) slept over at a friends house across the street last night. Normally that would be great giving my wife and I a little rest. However, at about 8-8:30 last night Shelby shows up. She said she was over to visit us. Missing Mommy and Daddy is really sweet, but she never told her friends parents that she was leaving. This started Jen (my wife's) internal worry machine. (FYI...Most women have a worry machine.) Jen starts to worry that Shelby might wake up in the night and try to come over. If she does, we would not hear her knock and she would be stuck outside and scared. Jennifer suggests that we go over and talk to Shelby about it. I thought that was a bad idea because there is no way to talk about it without bringing up the fact that Shelby was able to disappear without her friends parents knowledge.
So, just in case Shelby showed up during the night...I volunteered to sleep on the couch. Isn't it quite interesting that the word couch includes the word "OUCH" in it. I think whoever named the couch was trying to send a message. DON'T SLEEP ON IT! All well...Shelby did not show up....Mr. Lower Backpain did.

Here We GO!!!!

Ok,
I am late getting started with a blog. I would have even sworn that I would never start one, but here I am. The name of my blog "Adam Bomb" comes from a nickname a friend of mine gave my car. It is a 1996 Ford Taurus. It is rough man! But it is paid for...therefore....long live the Adam Bomb!!!!

The purpose of this blog is just for fun. I will tell amusing stories and thoughts that have no common thread....Just for your entertainment and/or to make you think.

I am a Christian, so some posts may be preachy. Sorry...I am who I am! I am married and may post funny stories about my wife and I, but make no mistake....I LOVE THAT WOMAN!!! She is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I have 2 daughters and might post about them. Once again...I LOVE THOSE GIRLS! Mainly, I will post funny stupid stories that have happened to me. I hope my stories will bring a glimmer of happiness to you. I know they will for me.