I fount me a new SWIMMIN HOLE YA'LL

This weekend Jen, Shelby, Bethany, and I went on a family outing to see some of the beautiful sites of our state. WOW...how beautiful it is! We went into the Ouachita National Forest and visited the Little Missouri River Falls. The drive was not bad until we went on dirt roads. The dirt roads were in great shape, but a minivan is not the ideal mode of transportation on them. Bumpy, slow, and dusty.

When we arrived, everyone needed to go to the "Tinkle Tavern" (that is our family's name for the bathroom). We were glad to see that there were bathrooms at the falls. However, I believe I would have rather used the woods than what we had to use. A GLORIFIED PORTA POTTY!!! It smelled horrid. Thank the Lord that we were up in the mountains where the temperature stays cool. Heat that stuff up and....well it would have been game over for me.

We had a quick picnic...I do mean quick because the aroma of the bathrooms would waft over to enhance our dining pleasure.

Besides that, we had a blast. The falls are gorgeous, even in August when we have not had a lot of rain. We swam in them. WOW WAS IT COLD!!!! We did get used to the temp of the water and had a great time. Being in the mountains and swimming in the icy waters changes a man...no really...my clothes were wet...I had to change. And you thought I was going to get deep and philosophical on you!

Bad Boys Bad Boys What ya gonna do...

We had an incident last night that still blows my mind. For those of you that don't know, I live on a quiet street. However, if you go a few streets Southeast....not so quiet. Sometimes we get a little foot traffic through our area that has nothing better to do than to cause problems. They don't live on this street, but the come through from time to time.

Last night after supper, Shelby invited her friend Madison over to play. I was watching the girls as my wife had two meetings last night to attend. As I was in my recliner Shelby and Madison storm into the house saying that these kids are going to beat Madison up. I looked outside and saw about 7 or 8 kids that I did not know hanging around in front of my house.

There is not a lot I can do about the situation unless they verbally harass my kids or they come unto my property. So I wait. Then one of the kids rides his bike through my lawn. I go outside and tell the kid to stay off of my lawn. (Sounds like an old man, but whatever.)

Then Madison's Mom comes home and I send Madison home. Don't worry...I watched her the whole way. Madison's mom tells the crowd to disburse and go away. The crowd moves down the street and starts to call Madison's Mom a cracker. (Not an endearing term.)

As I am talking to Danny, (my Contractor who is trying to finish my bathroom remodel), we see one of the older girls from the crowd walk up with 4 others and knock on the carport door of Madison's. Danny and I watch. Madison's Mom opens the door and tells the aggressor to leave. The girl screams "No...I'm gonna beat your !$#@%".

So Danny starts over to help as this girl starts backing Madison's Mom into her kitchen. I call 911. The aggressor flees the scene when she finds out we called the PO-PO! Five minutes later the police arrive. We all had to fill out reports and I think the girl was charged with Harassment (a misdemeanor). In my opinion this girl needs to be in Juvee!

I know where she lives and I know who she is. I have my eagle eye on her! I will summon my "Eagle Powers" Sorry that's a line from Nacho Libre. Anyway, I don't think this will be the last time the cops hear of her. She is too bold, angry, and out of control. I wish something could be done now to better correct her before we as citizens have to pay for her room and board in a prison somewhere.

Waiter THERE'S A FLY IN MY SOUP!!!

Ok, not a fly and not soup. Here is the scoop!
My parents came down for a visit this week. I love to spend time with them and I wish I did not live so far away...but back to the story. We went shopping in a suburb of our state capital for Shelby's back to school supplies/clothes. After a long morning of shopping, Jen, Shelby, Beth, my parents, and I were starving. (Ok...not starving..I mean most people who know me will agree missing a meal would do more good for me than not.) We were hungry. So we stopped at Applebees hoping for a good steak to charge us up for the remainder of the day.
Our waitress took our drink orders. When they arrived Jen had a big surprise! A piece of SOMEONES GUM WAS LEFT ON THE SIDE OF THE GLASS! HELLO! GAG A MAGGOT! Papa motioned for the manager who apologized and got Jen a new glass. I know what you are thinking..."Ok, that has happened to me...Big Deal!"
WELL it doesn't end there. My Mom ordered a steak and I ordered a salad and a pasta with chicken dish. When the food arrived everyone was enjoying and laughing about the gum situation. My Mom and I decide to trade plates since I am more of a steak guy and she thought my dish looked great. When I got the steak platter from Mom there was A LONG GNARLY HAIR ON THE POTATOES!!! COME ON MAN...REALLY...ARE YOU SERIOUS! Papa motions for the manager again.
The end result was a meal voucher for next visit and a new steak. In closing...might I reiterate...GAG A MAGGOT!!!!!!

Ripped OFF!!!!

I am angry. I don't normally get angry and stay angry. Jen, Shelby, Beth, Madison, and I went to the Mercy Me concert last night at a nearby theme park. We are season pass holders there.
Last week I went online to the parks website for basic info....Starting time and ticket price for Madison. (Madison does not have a season pass.) The site quoted the starting time at 8:00. Also, the site said reserved seating would be $5-$10. So, I offered to pay for Madison's ticket.
WELL!!!!! When we got there at 7:30 the concert was in full swing! It had started at 7 rather than 8. The ticket booth required me to pay $21.75 for Madison's ticket since the park was open until 10 that night.
I paid $21.75 to see about half of a Mercy Me show followed by Bethany throwing a fit. I think Beth was too hot and tired. Anyway, we did not even get to stay to ride rides after the concert due to Beth's status. We ended up going home directly after.
Do you ever wonder why someone invented the saying, "I love it when a plan comes together"? Me too....because it never does! AHHHHHHHHH.
P.S.
I emailed the park and gave them a piece of my mind. I am sure they are trembling in their money filled boots.

What we have here is a failure to communicate!

Well...I had to ground Shelby. She is at the age now that a grounding or stern talk works just as well as spankings. Thank God for that. You know spanking Shelby really did hurt me more than it did her. Groundings don't hurt me near as bad. I will reserve spankings for a last resort punishment.
Anyway...back to the offense. Shelby was playing with my hat. I told her to stop and explained that my hat is not a toy, it is flimsy and would not fair well in the care of a child. She took heed of my warning at first, but 30 minutes later she was back at it.
I was very upset and sent her to her room. After calming down (a very important step to any disciplinary action) I told her she was grounded for a day. To ensure this experience was a learning one, I explained that...and I quote..."Shelby, I am not mad about what you were playing with, I am mad that you were playing with something I told you not to play with. So, I am not mad about the hat, but about your disobedience. Do you understand?"
Shelby's reply was..."I don't understand just one word. What does replayin mean?"
Evidently, my accent is amplified in anger. "were playing" is evidently pronounced replayin in the south. Yeah...I'm a redneck.

Anyway, Shelby had to stay inside on the only sunny day last week.